Tuesday, February 26, 2008

The Wonderful World of Weddinghood

I want to write stuff here. Really, I do. But when I sit down to do it, all I can think is, "I'm tired. Wedding wedding wedding. Soooo tired."

Mainly for the sake of writing about something else, I just composed a whole post about some minor recent medical issues I've been having, which I was going to share with you. What am I, your grandmother, that I tell you about all my various levels and supplements? Sheesh.

So: more wedding talk it is! You are so lucky.

Our current guest list for the wedding? TWO HUNDRED AND TWENTY ONE. Holy. Crap. That is a lot of guests. I feel like a whole big bundle of wedding cliches when I say this, but seriously--how did this happen?* What's really nuts is that I feel like there are still a decent number of people that I'd like to invite, and whose feelings might be hurt if they are not invited.

I know that many--probably most--of the out-of-towners who are invited to this crazy shindig won't come. My brother pointed out over Christmas that it was great I was having a destination wedding in such a crazy, far-flung locale. Because let's face it, no one wants to go to Seattle! It's madness! (Let it be known that my brother lives in Alabama.) Many of my relatives have already told me that they consider the fly-over states impossible to fly over, and that they therefore will be staying in Alabama where the good Lord intended them to stay. But still. Two hundred and twenty one?

When I entered into the Wonderful World of Weddinghood, I thought that somehow, I would be different. Not for me, all the stress and worrying and trying to please everyone! Heck no! I am a LIBERATED LADY (I told myself), and therefore magically immune to such nonsense. I would plan my wedding with grace, poise, and humor, and perhaps the tiniest ironic twinkle in my eye.

Um. Yeah. Did I tell you about how a couple of weeks ago, I decided I hated my wedding dress (maybe), so I had to dig it out of the back of the closet and try it on (again) for R** and have him tell me that it wasn't hideous, and that I would not look like a freakishly large cotton ball or some such at my wedding? No?

And I won't even get started on the Transportation Problem, over which I have lost much sleep and possibly even some hair. Believe me, you don't want to hear about it.

I want to get married. At a wedding, even (although I can't really remember what was so wrong with eloping). But when I look at the to-do list for the wedding, I just want to take a nap.

*Answer: Everyone I am remotely related to is invited to this wedding.

**Still haven't come up with that nickname yet. I am leaning towards Rambo, as suggested by Pop Culture Librarian. Mainly because R really likes to smash things.


SteveM said...

Don't worry too much about the guest list. We tried to have 90-100, and invited something like 120+. Most of the people we expected not to come didn't come; a couple came and we were surprised. A bunch of the people we thought might be able to come couldn't. With two weeks to spare, E was able to invite a number of people from work.

We ended up with somewhere around 80-90 at the most, counting the officiant, her husband, and the musician (and those three skipped the reception).

I was worried about our numbers, too, but sometimes you just have to invite people so they don't hate you (or your parents). A lot of those people won't show up. However, they often buy you presents.

Lass. said...

Deep, cleansing breaths, my friend. (Interspersed with silent screams and lots of beer.) I too thought I would somehow avoid all the wedding-related b.s. - "We're getting married in our backyard - how casual, how easy!" How wrong I was. Anhow...hang in there...it WILL be worth it.

itzie said...

I'm still willing to help. Seriously. Now that it's not MY wedding anymore, I actually would actually like to help. You need someone to sit with the chairs after they are delivered? I'm your gal. You need someone to glue little bows or googley eyes to things? I'm there. Just say the word. I would have had a nervous breakdown had it not been for my "matron of honor"'s husband (the Patron of Honor?) helping out with some of the most dull but necessary tasks.

SteveM said...

Totally take itzie up on her offer. It seemed like we had everything under control until the week of the wedding when we suddenly remembered a bunch of little things that needed to be done. You've got a great bunch of reserves in local friends. Use them so you can enjoy the whole thing!

Are you making your own invitations? That was one of the things that adding guests complicated. We had to run out and get more of a certain paper.

Delegate now before you end up micromanaging everything up until you're standing there in your dress with Rambo (in his fatigues?)!

librarianista said...

Aw, you guys are the greatest. I might take you up on it, but I think with R's legions of sisters and sisters-in-law, it will be fine. I just need to get it together and delegate some duties. But I will probably bug you for more advice.

Librarian Girl said...

Is he allowed to call it a destination wedding if the couple actually LIVES in that city?

If you start calling your intended Rambo, I would laugh for days.

How about Ridonkerous? Or Lil' Meow Meow? Or LL Cool R? Or Smoochface Killah?

I got a million of em.